Consider the Donut
One of the things that I often say to myself is to look at the donut and not the hole. What I mean by this is that life is never black and white. Nothing is absolute. Any given circumstance, any person, any object, really anything, has positive and negative attributes.
I sometimes feel like we are surrounded by people who are always focused on the hole. Perhaps you can think about a time (frankly like now in New England) where there has been a string of sunny weather and then a bit of rain. How many times have you heard people complain about that rain? Two donuts here to look at - first, that it has been largely sunny, second that the rain brings us much needed water, and we don’t live in a time of drought or a place of fire. Or, maybe you can think about a time when you noticed something that a person said that irritated you. Do you get stuck on that one word, sentence or phrase, or do you reflect on the whole of the person and the relationship? I could go on and on.
I believe this is biological - back when we were cave people, it was essential to our survival to notice and learn from the negative. We are lucky enough to not live that way anymore, and yet our minds persist in noticing that which we don’t like or that which is ugly or different. I would maintain that if you open your eyes you will see that all the world is much more good than bad - similar to the way that a donut has much more yum than nothing.
So, the next time you find yourself complaining about something, noticing a person's negative qualities, dwelling on something that is not going right in your life, I invite you, too, to look at the donut and not the hole. You might just change your life.
Copyright 2019 Nancy C Murray
Nancy C Murray is a yoga teacher, yoga therapist, Reiki master and spiritual leader. She leads public and private yoga classes and healing sessions, transformational courses, and also retreats and spiritual journeys.
